The Fortune Cookie Page

Fortune Cookies

This page is dedicated to fortunes from Chinese restaurants. Why does this page exist? I don't really know the answer to that. You'll have to decide what usefulness (if any) this page has. You'll also have to decide whether or not any particular fortune here applies to you.


  1. To View the fortunes, scroll down a bit.
  2. To Add a fortune, fill out the form below.
  3. As an option, you may add the words "in bed" after any of these fortunes for a sick laugh and a possible sexual innuendo.

The Fortunes

(64 and counting!)

The greatest danger could be your stupidity. NEW!

When winter comes, heaven will rain success on you.NEW!

Love is coming your way.NEW!

When opportunity knocks, don't be in the bathroom.NEW!

Never wear your best pants when you go to fight for freedom.NEW!

Work hard and happiness wil come your way.NEW!

Everything is not yet lost.NEW!

Your heart desires to give money to the poor.

You will be frustrated, but will soon resolve the problem.

Tomorrow is a lucky day for you.

You will soon meet success.

Help! I am being held captive in a cookie factory!

If you desire money, get a job.

If your parents have thrown you out, don't worry they also threw out your sister!

Those who fear sailing should buy a waterbed.

You will soon have great success, but for a small price.

If your feeling down, eat a fortune cookie.

The one your waiting for will soon come. Don't ask me who it is.

Bloom where you are planted.

There is pleasure in life where the flower blooms

In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king.

The greatest law is the law of the people.

You will die a terrible death soon.
(Hmm, must be from one of those "unfortunate cookies." -Seth :-)

We will not know the worth of water till the well is dry.

Good advice jars the ear.

Every person is the architect of his own fortune.

Beware the one-armed man.

Life is a dashing and bold adventure.

Being prepared for any emergency means keeping a good disguise handy.

You will have luck in your personal affairs.

Disregard previous fortune.

A friend asks you only for your time, not your money.

Stop searching forever, happiness is just next to you.

Good news will come to you by mail.

You will have good luck and overcome many hardships.

You will be fortunate in everything you put your hands to.

You have an unusually magnetic personality.

Your principles mean more to you than any money or success.

Soon you will be sitting on top of the world.

Good things are being said about you.

You have a deep interest in all that is artistic.

Simplicity and clarity should be your theme in dress.

You are next in line for a promotion in your firm.

The laws sometimes sleep, but never die.

Try a new system or different approach.

How you look depends on where you go.

An aura of glamour and mystery surrounds your events of the week.

An important visitor will vow complete support.

You will meet an important person who will help you advance professionally.

Love will come looking for you.

You have an optimistic outlook on life, for very good reason.

You are bright. So give out that light!

Cooperate with those who have both know-how and money.

He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet.

You are generous, affectionate and impulsive.

Moderation in all things should be practiced sparingly.

The only constant since the beginning of time is change.

Your Yin and your Yang are no longer on speaking terms.

The secret of life is...I can't tell you. It's a secret.

Life to you is a series of dashing and adventurous crises.

You will be called to fill a position of high honor and responsibility.

There is yet time enough for you to take a different path.

You will inherit some money or a small piece of land.

You will travel far and wide, for both pleasure and business.

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The last update to this page happened late at night on 3/12/02.

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